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Articles
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Speed Dating Study
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dviser
http://www.new-dating.com/
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For a long time it was stated that when you make someone understand that you like him/her, that person will automatically like you in turn. Well, it was recently discovered that this rule of reciprocal attraction needs to be rectified a little bit for romantic relationships.
The statistics claim that the more you show your romantic desires towards all the people you like, the more they tend to reject you. (Could the reason be the fact that in these cases you look too desperate and obsessed?)
And vice versa, you aren’t usually rejected when you see no other potential partners around you besides the one you desire. (Now, at least this is what calms one down.)
What has been at the base of novels and art through all the times if not the physical chemistry and romance? That’s why social psychologists and all kinds of investigators have spent their time in searching for answers and observing the speed-daters as it was a lot harder observing the romantic attraction at the beginning of a relationship.
Paul W.Eastwick, a graduate student in psychology and the main author of this study, says, ”Unselective potential romantic partners are much less successful than selective partners who show that only you are someone really special for them. Our study consists of letting our speed-daters put all this in practice with a time of only 4 minutes for every date.”
“It’s something astonishing, the way a speed-dater is able to find out in just four minutes to what point the other person likes him and even to what point the speed-dater is unique and special for that person,” Finkel said. “Now this is something we can’t find the answer to for it’s beyond our imagination.”
The experiment which was meant to uncover the mystery of the importance of the first minutes of physical attraction was set up as following: 156 participants (students) had four-minute speed dates with 9-13 persons of the opposite sex. After each date they had to complete a questionnaire where they had to mention if they were attracted physically to the persons of the opposite sex, if they liked them and to what degree.
All the participants have entered the study Web site in the following and they have mentioned which of the persons they speed-dated they would like to meet with again. The ones whose “yeses” were mutual were given each other’s contacts.
Finkel concluded that, “A romantic relationship differs of a friendship by the fact that unlike in a friendship, the “all-loving” persons may seem desperate in a romantic relationship.”
Eastwick’s addition to this was, “That is, when you want to make someone be attracted to you, you will lose if you play the unselective person.”
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dviser
http://www.new-dating.com/
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